Thankful for my struggles

Being grateful for experiences that took us to the lowest points possible in life can be a difficult concept to comprehend but something that's very important to understand if essentially you want to live a happy life. So many people go through life feeling hard done by and that the world is against them, but the point they fail to realise is that constantly living with a negative mindset means life will always feel difficult. However, if a person is able to take positives from their hardships and look at them as lessons to be learnt then they will be far more likely to go on living a happier life than those who harvest in their misery.

I truly believe that every struggle we go through has a reason for it, whether that's to help find your strength, learn a particular lesson or to show you a different path. There genuinely can always be a positive to be found from those tough experiences. The important part of understanding this, is purely down to the mindset that you have.

With mental health conditions it's unfortunate that they carry the stigma of being a downfall for a person to have, because if people were to look at the condition as a whole, the positives actually far outweigh the negatives (in my opinion).

At the time I was unwell, I spent a lot of it feeling very angry at the world and that everyone else had it so much easier than me. These feelings were completely valid and totally understandable to have when experiencing such destress, but when I started to come through those dark times, I was suddenly able to see the world in a new light, with a completely new perspective. Those struggles I have had and still do have, made me the person I am today, which, I am extremely grateful for.

Of course, it's easy for me to say this now when I'm not going through an episode and I will never ignore the fact it's very hard to deal with, nearly impossible to deal with. However, I desperately want to show that there is a way out and you can learn to be thankful for those times. For anyone who cannot even begin to understand anything that I could be thankful for, I have explained just few of the many below.

I'm thankful for my struggles because they helped me find my strength.

This point is the biggest thing I learnt from my illness, before I became unwell, I would never have considered myself as 'strong'. If anything I would say I had quite low confidence in myself, my illness however helped to show me the incredible strength I do have and I feel very lucky to have discovered that because it taught me that nothing in the world will beat me.

I'm thankful for my struggles because they helped me learn to appreciate life.

The appreciation I've discovered for life is probably the thing I'm most thankful for. When you've been to the darkest point possible where you no longer want to be alive, in a strange way it teaches you to appreciate life so much more. When suffering from unexplainable depression all you ever dream about is finding happiness again so when you finally do, the feeling is better than you could have ever imagine. This is something I will never, ever take granted for.

I'm thankful for my struggles because they helped me discover my passion.

All my dark times helped to lead me to find my passion in life; passion for raising awareness, getting more people talking about mental health and fighting the stigma it carries. My struggles helped me to find my purpose and gave me a whole new sense of meaning which is something for a long time, I searched for. I finally know that my purpose in life is to help others with the experiences I've overcome and if I help just one person it's worth it.

I'm thankful for my struggles because they helped me find my courage.

To overcome my mental health struggles and come out the other side stronger takes a great deal of courage. Something which I'm not ashamed to say about myself. I feel proud to have been through what I have and be using it to assist others going through the same thing. Opening up and being public with my struggles takes courage too because whilst a lot of others feel ashamed to speak, I use that to empower myself to help those to not feel so alone.

I'm thankful for my struggles because they gave me understanding to help others.

In all honesty, those who have never had their own battle with mental health will never fully be able to understand and relate to someone in the same way as someone who has. I'm not doubting that those people cannot provide help and support but where they only have the ability to sympathise with a person, I can empathise. I can say myself that makes a huge difference when you're struggling, so I’m glad I have that advantage. 

For anyone who is going through a period of depression or suffering with any mental health condition at all, please do not fret if you feel far from grateful. I first started suffering with depression around 8 years ago and although struggles with my bipolar occasionally pop up, I am in a good place mentally, meaning that time has allowed me to feel this way. It's been an extremely long process to get to the point where I am thankful not resentful. What changed it for me was when I realised that being angry at the world gets you nowhere, it doesn't make the pain go away and certainly doesn't make you feel any better.

All of this isn't to say I haven't struggled since those times and that I always feel 100% grateful. I have since had new struggles that have risen such as infertility, as I have written about in previous posts. Struggles which I certainly don't feel overly positive about all the time, but what I've learnt from my past experiences is to always look for the positives in amongst the negatives and to know that things do improve.

If you're going through a difficult time, hold on, remember that no matter how long it may take, you will feel better and the pain will end. Try to find something positive to take from each day, from the smallest things like a text message from a friend, to the big things like waking up in the morning for another day because that one small thought can change your whole day.

My email is always open for any heart that may need it, don't beat yourself up if you’re feeling as if the whole worlds against you, that's ok, we all do at times but focus on all on the good things you've got going on, instead of the bad.

Chloevowels1995@gmail.com.